Last visit was: Tue Oct 27, 2020 10:13 am It is currently Tue Oct 27, 2020 10:13 am

All times are UTC+01:00




 [ 124 posts ]  Go to page Previous 15 6 7 8 9 Next
Author Message
 Post subject: Re: Jokes thread...
PostPosted: Sun Sep 20, 2020 10:24 am 
Offline
User avatar

Joined: Wed May 06, 2009 1:43 pm
Posts: 4557
Current ride: The wife
Location: Cofa's tree
I take my time and pack my bags the way I want to and when I eventually finish....I start the task of going through my pockets to find the bank card that's hiding in my phone case :twisted:

_________________
I hate being strapped for cash....but it pays the bills


Top
   
 
 Post subject: Re: Jokes thread...
PostPosted: Sun Sep 20, 2020 5:01 pm 
Offline
User avatar

Joined: Wed May 06, 2009 7:42 pm
Posts: 2922
Current ride: M2 Razorback
Location: Mouth of the Port in the Shire of Hamp
Finmows wrote:
I take my time and pack my bags the way I want to and when I eventually finish....I start the task of going through my pockets to find the bank card that's hiding in my phone case :twisted:

You like the cheap prices, I presume, so accept that their business model depends on employing fewer staff, who therefore need to get customers through the tills quickly. Then, rather than 'getting your own back' on the cashier, think of the other customers waiting in the queue behind you and accept that you need to just dump it all back in your trolley, move to the packing area beyond the tills and take all day to pack your bags, if you so wish.
Or, go to Waitrose, take your time packing, have a nice leisurely chat with the cashier, and pay half as much again for the same gear.
Amazes me how many thick/ selfish/ socially unaware arseholes still don't get this. :roll:

_________________
'98 M2 Razorback, it's a keeper.


Top
   
 
 Post subject: Re: Jokes thread...
PostPosted: Mon Sep 21, 2020 12:20 am 
Offline
User avatar

Joined: Wed May 06, 2009 1:43 pm
Posts: 4557
Current ride: The wife
Location: Cofa's tree
rik wrote:
Amazes me how many thick/ selfish/ socially unaware arseholes still don't get this. :roll:

Especially when they operate tills in supermarkets ;)

_________________
I hate being strapped for cash....but it pays the bills


Top
   
 
 Post subject: Re: Jokes thread...
PostPosted: Thu Sep 24, 2020 10:40 pm 
Offline
User avatar

Joined: Wed May 06, 2009 1:43 pm
Posts: 4557
Current ride: The wife
Location: Cofa's tree
As there's nobody about :roll: :twisted:


How do you get a nun pregnant?

Get a choirboy to fart in her cünt!

_________________
I hate being strapped for cash....but it pays the bills


Top
   
 
 Post subject: Re: Jokes thread...
PostPosted: Sat Sep 26, 2020 5:14 pm 
Offline

Joined: Wed May 06, 2009 5:10 pm
Posts: 2046
Current ride: 99 Cyclone M2
Location: Liverpool
;)


You do not have the required permissions to view the files attached to this post.

_________________
Last year I joined a group for anti-social people
We haven't met yet.


Top
   
 
 Post subject: Re: Jokes thread...
PostPosted: Mon Sep 28, 2020 7:40 pm 
Offline
User avatar

Joined: Wed May 06, 2009 3:35 pm
Posts: 2058
Current ride: A black one
Location: Wales. The land of dragons, welshcakes and full reservoirs.
Welshman to his wife " I'm off down the club, get your coat on" Wife " Ohhhh lovely, am I coming with you?" Husband " No, I'm turning the heating off"

_________________
Dusty 001


Top
   
 
 Post subject: Re: Jokes thread...
PostPosted: Mon Sep 28, 2020 10:03 pm 
Offline

Joined: Wed May 06, 2009 5:10 pm
Posts: 2046
Current ride: 99 Cyclone M2
Location: Liverpool
Woman goes to see the doctor
Woman " Doctor every time I sneeze I have an orgasm"
Doctor " Oh really and have you been taking anything for it"
Woman " Aye pepper"
;)

_________________
Last year I joined a group for anti-social people
We haven't met yet.


Top
   
 
 Post subject: Re: Jokes thread...
PostPosted: Mon Sep 28, 2020 10:08 pm 
Offline

Joined: Wed May 06, 2009 5:10 pm
Posts: 2046
Current ride: 99 Cyclone M2
Location: Liverpool
I first met my wife when she came to join our local motorcycle outlaws club,
She was quized by the membership committee and asked " have you ever been picked up by the fuzz"
" No but I've been swung round by my tits a few times" she replied :shock: ;)

_________________
Last year I joined a group for anti-social people
We haven't met yet.


Top
   
 
 Post subject: Re: Jokes thread...
PostPosted: Tue Sep 29, 2020 7:30 am 
Offline
User avatar

Joined: Wed May 06, 2009 1:43 pm
Posts: 4557
Current ride: The wife
Location: Cofa's tree
Jeezus....if we're into that :roll:


Why did the chicken cross the road?...

_________________
I hate being strapped for cash....but it pays the bills


Top
   
 
 Post subject: Re: Jokes thread...
PostPosted: Tue Sep 29, 2020 7:32 am 
Offline

Joined: Wed May 06, 2009 5:10 pm
Posts: 2046
Current ride: 99 Cyclone M2
Location: Liverpool
Dunno why ?

Sometimes the old ones are the best ones 😉

_________________
Last year I joined a group for anti-social people
We haven't met yet.


Top
   
 
 Post subject: Re: Jokes thread...
PostPosted: Sat Oct 03, 2020 5:14 pm 
Offline

Joined: Wed May 06, 2009 5:10 pm
Posts: 2046
Current ride: 99 Cyclone M2
Location: Liverpool
Glaswegian chap is driving around the Safari park with his little lad in the car and as they drive through the lion enclosure the little lad asks " daddy why is that lion licking the other lions bum like that"
Dad replies " well son that lion there has just eaten an Englishman, now he's trying to get the taste out of his mouth" lOl

_________________
Last year I joined a group for anti-social people
We haven't met yet.


Top
   
 
 Post subject: Re: Jokes thread...
PostPosted: Sat Oct 03, 2020 7:05 pm 
Offline
User avatar

Joined: Tue May 05, 2009 8:00 pm
Posts: 9963
Current ride: X1 2001
Location: southampton
:rotfl: :rotfl:


Top
   
 
 Post subject: Re: Jokes thread...
PostPosted: Sun Oct 04, 2020 8:24 am 
Offline

Joined: Tue Jun 08, 2010 4:34 pm
Posts: 733
Current ride: m2 cyclone
Location: leicester
Why did the polish geezer cross the road? So he could pinch the chickens job as well


Top
   
 
 Post subject: Re: Jokes thread...
PostPosted: Tue Oct 06, 2020 12:47 pm 
Offline
User avatar

Joined: Wed May 06, 2009 4:03 pm
Posts: 4325
Current ride: S1w X1 1125CR
Location: NNW of Sarfampton
The old lady handed her bank card to a bank cashier and said, “I would like to withdraw £10
The cashier told her, “For withdrawals less than £100 please use the ATM.”

The old lady wanted to know why ...
The cashier returned her bank card and irritably told her, “These are the rules. Please leave if there is no other matter. There is a line of customers behind you.”

The old lady remained silent for a few seconds, then handed the card back to the cashier and said, “Please help me withdraw all the money I have.”

The cashier was astonished when she checked the account balance. She nodded her head, leaned down and respectfully told her, you have £300,000 in your account and the bank doesn't have that much cash currently. Could you make an appointment and come again tomorrow?

The old lady then asked how much she could withdraw immediately.
The cashier told her any amount up to £3000
"Well, please let me have £3000 now", the cashier then handed it very friendly and respectfully to her

The old lady put £10 in her purse and asked the cashier to deposit £2990 back into her account.

the moral of this tale .......

Don't be difficult with old people, they spent a lifetime learning the skills

_________________
I'm a Hornithologist, I get excited by exotic birds.........


Top
   
 
 Post subject: Re: Jokes thread...
PostPosted: Sun Oct 11, 2020 11:52 pm 
Offline
User avatar

Joined: Wed May 06, 2009 1:43 pm
Posts: 4557
Current ride: The wife
Location: Cofa's tree
I’ve just been watching the new line-up for Strictly.

Apparently Caroline Flack is coming back for the Halloween Special. :twisted:

_________________
I hate being strapped for cash....but it pays the bills


Top
   
 
 [ 124 posts ]  Go to page Previous 15 6 7 8 9 Next

All times are UTC+01:00


Who is online

Users browsing this forum: CommonCrawl [Bot] and 0 guests


You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum
You cannot post attachments in this forum

Jump to:  
Powered by phpBB® Forum Software © phpBB Limited