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Finmows
 Post subject: Re: Jokes Thread
PostPosted: Mon Nov 23, 2020 12:05 pm 
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Joined: Wed May 06, 2009 1:43 pm
Posts: 4509
Current ride: The wife
Location: Cofa's tree
I walked up to the counter at Screwfix and said.. "do you have a bleeding valve for a radiator?"

The assistant replied.. "not with that attitude sir."

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gusm2
 Post subject: Re: Jokes Thread
PostPosted: Tue Nov 24, 2020 12:48 am 
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Joined: Wed May 06, 2009 5:10 pm
Posts: 2102
Current ride: 99 Cyclone M2
Location: Liverpool
Bit lazy to paste it I know :coat:


You do not have the required permissions to view the files attached to this post.

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Last year I joined a group for anti-social people
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Finmows
 Post subject: Re: Jokes Thread
PostPosted: Thu Nov 26, 2020 1:47 pm 
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Joined: Wed May 06, 2009 1:43 pm
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Current ride: The wife
Location: Cofa's tree
Today is thanksgiving....


the day we give thanks we're not American!

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gusm2
 Post subject: Re: Jokes Thread
PostPosted: Sun Nov 29, 2020 11:17 am 
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Joined: Wed May 06, 2009 5:10 pm
Posts: 2102
Current ride: 99 Cyclone M2
Location: Liverpool
Just found out my grandad is addicted to Viagra.
Nobody is taking it harder than my grandma ;)

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Ralph2
 Post subject: Re: Jokes Thread
PostPosted: Fri Dec 11, 2020 3:11 pm 
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Joined: Wed May 06, 2009 1:44 pm
Posts: 113
Current ride: XB9R XB12Scg
Its 11 years to the day when my mate Tony came running out shouting

"its a boy!!" with tears running down his face














We have never been on holiday to Thailand again.

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You don't stop laughing when you grow old, you grow old when you stop laughing.
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barney
 Post subject: Re: Jokes Thread
PostPosted: Fri Dec 11, 2020 5:25 pm 
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Joined: Mon Nov 07, 2011 7:10 pm
Posts: 3283
Current ride: Buell ulysses
Location: Telford
:rotfl: :rotfl:

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Buell Ulysses XB12X 06/08
CCM R30 (650cc) 02
Norton Dominators
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deepsix
 Post subject: Re: Jokes Thread
PostPosted: Mon Dec 21, 2020 1:46 pm 
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Joined: Wed May 06, 2009 4:03 pm
Posts: 4341
Current ride: S1w X1 1125CR
Location: NNW of Sarfampton
Just got back from a friend's funeral who drowned last week.

I got a lot of abuse from his relatives about my floral tribute in the shape of a life jacket.



But as I told everyone, "It's what he would have wanted "

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I'm a Hornithologist, I get excited by exotic birds.........
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Dusty
 Post subject: Re: Jokes Thread
PostPosted: Mon Dec 21, 2020 3:32 pm 
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Joined: Wed May 06, 2009 3:35 pm
Posts: 2099
Current ride: A black one
Location: Wales. The land of dragons, welshcakes and full reservoirs.
lOl

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Dusty 001
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gusm2
 Post subject: Re: Jokes Thread
PostPosted: Sun Dec 27, 2020 11:17 pm 
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Joined: Wed May 06, 2009 5:10 pm
Posts: 2102
Current ride: 99 Cyclone M2
Location: Liverpool
Got some sad news today, after 7 years of medical training he has been stuck off for 1 minor discretion, he slept with one of his patients and can no longer work in the job he loves, what a waste of time, money and effort, he's a genuinely nice guy and a brilliant vet :coat:

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Finmows
 Post subject: Re: Jokes Thread
PostPosted: Thu Dec 31, 2020 4:11 pm 
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Joined: Wed May 06, 2009 1:43 pm
Posts: 4509
Current ride: The wife
Location: Cofa's tree
Get Aldi checkout staff to distribute the vaccine.. We'll all be done by 3rd January

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Finmows
 Post subject: Re: Jokes Thread
PostPosted: Tue Jan 26, 2021 9:58 am 
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Joined: Wed May 06, 2009 1:43 pm
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Current ride: The wife
Location: Cofa's tree
Large crystal ball for sale.
Only £50, but you will haggle me down and buy it for £35.

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Finmows
 Post subject: Re: Jokes Thread
PostPosted: Thu Feb 04, 2021 7:49 am 
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Joined: Wed May 06, 2009 1:43 pm
Posts: 4509
Current ride: The wife
Location: Cofa's tree
I can't help but think ITV would improve their ratings if they stopped showing Midsomer Murders and started showing Midsomer Sexual Assaults or Midsomer Rapes instead.

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Finmows
 Post subject: Re: Jokes Thread
PostPosted: Wed Feb 24, 2021 10:24 am 
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Joined: Wed May 06, 2009 1:43 pm
Posts: 4509
Current ride: The wife
Location: Cofa's tree
The wife suggested if I was bored during lockdown, to make a bird table.

Now she's kicking off because I've only put her in fifth place..

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gusm2
 Post subject: Re: Jokes Thread
PostPosted: Sat Mar 13, 2021 8:07 pm 
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Joined: Wed May 06, 2009 5:10 pm
Posts: 2102
Current ride: 99 Cyclone M2
Location: Liverpool
Just had a decorator in to do some work and I got chatting to him,
Turns out he's a British airways pilot who's been furloughed and earning a bit of extra cash,


He made a lovely job of the landing ;)

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Last year I joined a group for anti-social people
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Finmows
 Post subject: Re: Jokes Thread
PostPosted: Sat Mar 20, 2021 1:33 pm 
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Joined: Wed May 06, 2009 1:43 pm
Posts: 4509
Current ride: The wife
Location: Cofa's tree
ʎɐqǝ uo pɹɐoqʎǝʞ ɐ ʎnq ı ǝɯıʇ ʇsɐן ǝɥʇ sı sıɥʇ

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